Up and down, left or right. The emotions and decisions we make are what fills our lives and defines who and where we are. For some strange reason the last week of June and the first week of July are very active weeks that over the years events and decisions seem to occur. It is a time filled with sadness and celebration.
June 30th, 1981 Trevor was born
July 1st, 1983 Carrie was born
July 5th, 1996 Alan and I were wed
June 25th, 2002 Trevor died
June 25th, 2003 I moved back to Texas
It was also during these weeks in 2008 that Alan went to work for UPS - which because of their Adoption benefit we were able to adopt Abate and Fantu. These events and decisions are intertwined. Happiness leading to sadness. Tragedy to great joy. I must acknowledge that in my grief I was led to pursue my dreams, that my life took a direction I otherwise would not have ventured. We are only where we are today because of where we have been.
June 25th will always be a difficult sad day. I will probably always wonder and ask why Trevor. I will miss him. But I can also look around and see where it has led me. I can see what I was able to do. I can see the possibilities everyday when I see my family. The tears of sadness can become tears of joy.
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